Where's Sacagawea When You Need Her?

Tracking packages... it's a great service offered by UPS and other postal companies. But, quite frankly, it's just not good enough.

When I'm anxiously awaiting a package, it does no good to tell me "scheduled to arrive on the estimated delivery date" and then put a few teasers below:

MY TOWN, NW, US 07/28/20094:16 A.M. OUT FOR DELIVERY

BIG CITY , NW , US	07/27/2009	3:26 P.M.	DEPARTURE SCAN
	07/27/2009	1:04 A.M.	ARRIVAL SCAN

NEXT TOWN, MW , US	07/22/2009	3:01 P.M.	DEPARTURE SCAN
	07/22/2009	10:15 A.M.	ARRIVAL SCAN
SOME TOWN, NE, US	07/22/2009	5:55 A.M.	DEPARTURE SCAN
SOME TOWN , NE , US	07/21/2009	11:29 P.M.	ORIGIN SCAN

What, for pete's sake, was that package doing between the 22nd and the 27th?? That's a long time to go without an update. And despite the fact you can opt to receive "e-mail notifications" of any new activities, I still dutifully checked the site every morning (and mid-morning, and afternoon, and evening, and...) anyway to see if there was an update which they hadn't sent me by e-mail (never happened).

I want REAL TIME updates, baby! I want to follow every turn by satellite until that package arrives on my doorstep.

It's almost worse knowing it's going to arrive today. Every time I hear a truck my heart skips a beat. It would have to arrive on GARBAGE day!

It's times like this when I wish Summer were over and I didn't have time to obsess over packages.

In the future I'll just wait patiently and be happily surprised when it arrives, unexpectedly...

... or not.